Mist of the Soul

Have you seen it?

I had the honor of working in hospice for several years.

I served both in the capacity of an acupuncturist and massage therapist who helped patients with pain to have more ease and as the co-creator of an 11th Hour Program, in which I sat and vigiled with those who had begun actively dying.

‘Actively dying’ may sound like a strange term the first time one hears it, it refers to the final phase most people go through before death in which they may appear unresponsive, their blood pressure drops and the skin can start to have a mottled appearance. This phase can last for several days or more.

Changes in breathing often occur during this time, there may be a rattling sound to the breath and the time between breaths can become longer.

Early in my hospice career, I was vigiling with an elderly woman named Helen who was preparing to pass at home. A few members of her family were present and had been at the bedside with me. They needed a break and I encouraged them to eat dinner, they went off to the kitchen to relax, leaving me to sit with the woman and the little dog who had been her constant companion throughout her illness.

Helen’s mouth dropped open as her jaw relaxed, and I could see her chest rising and falling softly in the dim light of the room.

As she exhaled, I began to see what appeared to be a fine, white mist escaping from her mouth. I put on my glasses, thinking that my eyes were playing tricks on me.

Helen’s jaw dropped a bit more and it was clear to me that upon every exhale, a slightly larger cloud of white mist was emitting from her with the breath.

Helen seemed to hold her breath for a moment and let out one final exhale. In that moment, her countenance became entirely peaceful and it was clear that she had passed, the room felt very still and calm.

It was also clear that she had waited until her family members had left the room to pass, it seems that many people do not wish to die in front of family members as they do not want that to be the last memory the family has of them.

I left this encounter with many questions. No one had mentioned this phenomena in the classes I had taken on death and dying.

As time went on, I repeatedly witnessed the white mist emitting from a person in their final hours, often coming out of their mouth, sometimes rising off of their body.

It seemed to be a process of the soul separating from the physical body.

In other instances, when a person died more rapidly, I observed a white misty form rise up off of the body, or shoot out of the crown of the head.

Early one New Year’s Eve, I was called to sit with a patient who had been admitted to a hospital through the ER, she had had a stroke and was not responsive. An 11th Hour volunteer , Haley, met me at the hospital, there were no family members present for the patient.

We stood on either side of the bed and connected with the patient, each of us gently touching her arms. The patient gave a long exhale and with eyes open, I saw a swirl of white light and mist exit the crown of her head and fly quickly upward. Haley followed this up with her eyes and said, “There she goes!”

“You saw that, too?!”, I asked.

“Yes, I’ve seen it several times before.” Haley acknowledged.

It was reassuring to me that someone else was able to confirm what I was seeing. After that I had other volunteers sit with me who were able to see the white mist, and a few hospice nurses who admitted to seeing the mist. They seemed reluctant to talk about it, as though there was a fear of being thought to be crazy.

On a hunch, I read the Tibetan Book of the Dead, hoping for answers.

The Book mentions all of these phenomena and explains them from a Tibetan Buddhist perspective, and while I do not believe in all of the theories described in this text, I felt somewhat validated.

After the Civil War in this country the way death was handled changed immensely. The process of embalming began to be used so that the bodies of soldiers who died in battle could be sent by train to be buried near their homes.

Embalming soon became standard and death was taken out of the home.

With the advent of the hospice movement, it became more common for people to remain at home to be cared for while they are dying and thus it has become normalized again for people to be able to be present with a loved one at the time of death, seeing things that might have been thought “woo-woo” in the past.

Let me know in the comments if you’ve had any such experiences while sitting with a loved one in the dying process, I’d love to hear from you.